Are you a pressure parent? Do you have too many high expectations for your child? I didn’t think I was, and even after really giving this topic some serious thought, I still feel I am not a pressure parent. But, I do know a few people who are. It is unreal! I see their Facebook posts – especially the ones from parents of kids in sports programs. Some of these parents get way too upset if their child isn’t doing as well as they feel he or she should, in my opinion. Too much pressure on kids is extremely unhealthy for them.
Of course, setting goals is not a bad thing, but it is important to know how your child responds to these set goals. If your child is suddenly having nightmares about not living up to your expectations, there is obviously a problem.
Being a Supporter
Show support, don’t ‘push’ your child to succeed. This is especially important if you see your child is being too hard on themselves. “The key is to be your child’s biggest fan and nurturer,” says Boston-based psychotherapist Karen Ruskin, Psy.D, author of The 9 Key Techniques for Raising Respectful Children Who Make Responsible Choices. “Act as a ‘supporter’ rather than a ‘pusher’.”
Pressure on Kids
Putting too much pressure on kids can lead to adverse effects that can follow them into adulthood. You may not even know you’re putting too much pressure on your child. Think about this: your child comes home from school with a B on her test. She is proud of her score because it was a tough exam. You say, “Why didn’t you get an A?” That right there can kill her mood and make her feel as though you want, no, you expect her to be perfect. That example right there shows how you may be putting too much pressure on your child and not even realize it.