How Much PDA is Too Much?


Christmastime is a popular time of the year to see marriage proposals. With that comes the oozing of love and affection between couples as they celebrate their upcoming union. It’s also a time for couples to get closer to one another as this season of love, joy and charity fall upon us. The one thing that we see often as proof of that is an uptick in public displays of affection, or PDA. Some of us swoon at these displays of love, but some examples of it make others cringe. There has to be a fine line, right?  So, how much PDA is too much?

For the most part, the line is a relative one. One person’s comfort level is crossing the line for another – or not nearly enough for others. While you can’t gauge an individual’s max level of acceptance at a glance, there are some simple lines to draw that should appease most.

Consider the Environment

Location, location, location! It’s not just for realtors anymore. If you’re at a casual party where most are paired up with their significant others, sweeping each other into a kiss when the urge strikes is a safe move. Even a dash into the corner for a more passionate kiss is probably acceptable. However, if you’re at an office function or party, it’s best to behave in much the same manner as you would if you were interacting on a normal workday. When in doubt, sneak out — for the more intimate exchanges.

What is Good for the Goose, May Offend the Gander

Never presume that others around you are as into PDA as you and your partner may be. It’s easy to get lost in the moment, but listen to that little voice in your head that reminds you that Uncle Jim sitting across from the table from you may not have the same level of appreciation as you do for the periodic pinch on the butt of another. It’s usually best to keep things low key for crowded situations with people you know and those who may just be at the movies to actually watch the film on the screen. Keep in mind the audience around you, since your behaviors are always seen by someone.

Find Alternatives to Build Up for Later

This is where you and your partner get to be creative! Find other ways to show your affection that becomes “code” for you both, yet others are clueless as to just how much affection the two of you are showing one another. Special hand movements, a wink, and even code words or phrases can become very exciting when just the two of you know what’s going on. You may do little and innocent-looking things to others that you both know will lead to more passionate interactions after friends and family have gone home for the evening. Stoke the fire for later instead of burning up all at once.

Overall, remember to respect the varying sensitivities of all others around you. A quick kiss and hand-holding is universally acceptable to the majority of people. If the urge strikes to show a little more, discretion is the rule of thumb. While you may have the desire to go full-throttle at any given moment, make that moment last by waiting for the right time and place to make that more overt expression of amour. Others around you may appreciate that more than if you were to choose otherwise.

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